I finally excluded myself

[pkpk]

Today I finally excluded myself from all gambling after 20 years of addiction. 

Never thought this day would come. I never wanted to exclude myself totally because I wanted to be able to play for smaller amounts or place some sports bets for fun. But the reality is I cant control myself and I have to be realistic and honest to myself and for my family. 

I have hit a few times close to 1000x with the live casino this week, only to lose it again within a blink of an eye. I start betting with a few cents/euros on Crazytime and other live games and if im lucky to win big, I raise my bets drastically to hundreds sometimes even 1000euro or more per spin. Insane amounts for someone like me with just a average income. Its always the same story. Im tired of always being broke as an adult, waiting for my next paycheck and gamble it all away in an instant. I am lucky that my income is partly managed by my partner so we were always be able to pay the bills. But my addiction is kept secret for everyone around me because there were never any visible problems. 

Earlier this year a won a huge amount of money and half of that was used for buying a new car (thank god I did that) and the other half was lost back to gambling. It was a huge sum of cash for me that was lost back but I excused myself by thinking that I bought the car. But the reality is to get that amount back again I need to save for 10 years with my normal income. Its sickening thinking about it.

The exclusion will last for at least 2 years and im looking forward to life without gambling, to save up some money and live a normal life, without all the stress. Quit smoking is also part of my plan which I think will be much easier when gambling is out of the way.

I know there are more people like me out there and I hope by sharing this short story that you also will be honest to yourself and take actions to prevent even bigger problems. I believe it is never to late to take action, it took me 20 years of my life, but I feel good about this decision now. It is the only way for me to finally move on and live a healthier life and build on my own future.

[Benfaile]

good you do it respect good luck witch you life

[ned911]

Good luck mate. I know how that feels. Trying to get myself right year after year. It goes back and forth. Being true to yourself is a good way to go. Stay strong 💪

[NeWbZs]

It's a very brave step, well done and good luck with not gambling.

[tommaay86]

Good decision to take a break, I had to do it as well, twice.. My personal experience was that after a year of non-online gambling, it is very easy to pick up your addiction from where you left it. I like casual gambling for fun but the betting amounts can increase very heavily if you're on a losing streak.

Find a hobby/passion to replace the time you used to spend for gambling. Best of luck!

 

 

[Skylined87]

Well done @pkpk, decision well taken. You won't regret it. Wish you luck and hope you stay on track  
 

[dagreenblazer]

Congratulations dude, and i hope you enjoy the new life it gives you as well - you've just won yourself the next 20 years, and that's worth far more than any money!

 

It sounds like it had all got you trapped in a vicious circle, so it's impressive you have taken steps to pull yourself out - the money lost is one thing, but plenty of other people have lost their homes, jobs & families for the same reason, so you should take pride in the fact you've stopped it before it got real bad. And acknowledging you can't trust yourself is a sign of strength too - only weak people ignore their weaknesses.

 

The only other advice i would give you is it could help to use this time away to examine what gambling actually gave you - if you ever feel like you're missing it, then use that time to try to pinpoint why you miss it, apart from it being just a habit. I think once you've had more time back with the family, etc and you can compare & contrast what both activities give you, i think you'll realise most gambling is actually quite boring and, beyond the habit of it, it isn't really giving you much fulfillment at all. I'm glad you've got other activities around you that you can do while you start unwinding the habit, and hopefully in 2 years the thought of ever wasting thousands again will just seem like a stupid joke. GG!

 

 

[Matthew Hodges]

NICE ONE. Be safe. 

[gypsycream26]

All the best to you  , i hope you can get through it , time is a great healer      🙂